I've got your hair

Turn around, you will see your hair. Tricked you, you have no hair if you are reading this because I would have stolen it by the second word. Do you want your hair back? You will have to work for it, take a spork and cut up a melon so it resembles my face, then mail it to your nearest bath house and I shall send a carrier pigeon to you shortly after I receive it. Send the pigeon back and you will be rewarded.

Wha?

Look at your wall, or your ceiling, basically any part of a room. And think about how that wall could beat you at chess, because that wall could fall on you, beating you at chess. So go buy a chess board, and practise until you can beat your wall. When you succeed, send me an email and you can come and challenge my wall, it has beaten me too much.

67 Wishes

Today, for everyone who is here, I shall grant you 67 wishes. 67 because of the face that you will take a mere 67 seconds to think about what you would wish for and it will then take you 67 seconds to comment. This post took me 67 days to write and this post consists of 67 words exactly. Exactly 67 sandwiches were consumed to create energy to form this. Surprised? I hope so.

Dig For Me

Grab your shovels and DIG! Go to your garden, if you don't have one go to friends, and dig square in the middle. Eventually you will meet me, I will be waiting for you with a picnic under my arm, but be careful, I have an imposter who wears a blue hat, if you see him punch him very hard in his dog, he will leave you alone. When you meet me you can have a sandwich, but only a jam one, if you don't like jam tough cookies. Yes, you can have tough cookies instead.

This is Eyebal

I will take you on a journey, a journey that will make you want to walk out your door and bite your legs off just to prove a point. A journey that will drive you to insanity so much so that you would kill for a new pair of silk socks. So start this journey, with your boots tied and your lunch packed, off you go.